Mobility Mom Bookshelf: Santa Has a Six-Pack by: Erin Mallon (Audio Review)

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Book Description

“A ‘World’s Fittest Santa’ contest? Please tell me you’re joking."
My store manager is in fact not joking.

All I want for Christmas this year is to finally quit my job and figure out what the hell I’m doing with my life. Instead, here I am, auditioning sexy, shirtless men in fake white beards so hundreds of horny mall shoppers can sit on their laps.

A dream come true for some women, I’m sure.

For me? This is my personal nightmare.

As a former professional dancer, my days of excessive exercise and counting calories are behind me. The last thing I need is a Santa with a six-pack.

But that is exactly what I get when my instant nemesis is crowned our winner, and I’m promoted to his personal “Santa Handler.”

Santa is supposed to be ancient and generous and kind. This guy is young. And arrogant. And obtuse. Case in point: this is a man who regularly boasts about going “balls deep into Christmas.” Basically, he is everything I hate about the fitness industry tied up in one glistening, muscle-bound package.

So why am I fantasizing about unwrapping him to see what’s underneath?

About Erin Mallon

Erin Mallon's debut romantic comedy novel, Flirtasaurus releases in July 2020. She is an award-winning narrator of over 500 books and an accomplished playwright and producer in New York City. She has written over 40 plays, which have been produced Off-Broadway and all over the country, including These Walls Can Talk, a raucous theatrical love letter to the romance audiobook community. She lives in a little yellow house on the outskirts of NYC with her husband and Three J's. http://www.erinmallon.com

My Thoughts

Santa Has a Six-Pack by Erin Mallon is an absolute holiday triumph that I devoured the moment I started. After spending the previous month immersed in I didn't realize how much I needed this hilarious, heartfelt romcom to lift my spirits.

The story follows Penny, a former professional dancer who is weary of the fitness industry's superficiality and just wants to quit her retail job. Her plans are derailed when her manager announces a “World’s Fittest Santa” contest, tasking a reluctant Penny with becoming the “Santa Handler” for the winner.

Enter Matt, a gym-owning, golden retriever of a man whose arrogance and "balls-deep into Christmas" attitude initially rub Penny the wrong way. Watching this grumpy-sunshine, enemies-to-lovers dynamic unfold was pure joy; between the awkward tension, festive raps, and seven minutes in heaven, the book kept a smile on my face from the first chapter to the last.

What truly elevates this experience is the incredible performance by narrators Erin Mallon and Jason Clarke. They are a dream team, and hearing the author herself bring Penny to life alongside Clarke’s charismatic portrayal of Matt is magical.

Erin perfectly captures Penny’s grumpy sass and the vulnerable, tender moments she navigates regarding her family, while Jason is absolutely in his element. His expressive, upbeat delivery—especially during that legendary rap audition—perfectly conveys Matt’s gooey, cinnamon-roll heart. Together, they create a palpable chemistry of longing and lust that brings these characters to life in a way that feels deeply genuine.

This story is so much more than just workplace shenanigans; it is a beautifully layered romance featuring dedicated best friends, family drama, and the healing power of intimacy. Penny is a remarkably relatable lead—kind, advocate-hearted, and dreaming of opening a positive dance studio—while Matt’s loyalty and genuine kindness make him the perfect partner.

Their journey from reluctant coworkers to a support system for one another, through both laugh-out-loud antics and deeply emotional moments, made for an unforgettable listen. If you are looking for a festive, swoony, and spicy holiday gem filled with grand gestures and a hard-earned HEA that will make your heart merry, look no further. This is a Christmas classic I know I will revisit year after year, and I am already counting down the days until Eugene’s book next year.